The three teenager Jean Twenge girls are not exactly, but they were exposed to the most striking technology rules than most of their friends had to follow.
Julia, 13, has a “child phone”, called Julia-without any online applications and limited applications. Kate, who is now 18 years old, has a Philip’s phone until she was 16 years old. Her friends were crammed with the duration of the time she took to direct the simple texts, but Kate says that she learned the skills that her peers never had to master. Like, how to find its way without GPS. Or how to make a real phone conversation.
“I love Talk to the phone! “Kate, a university student and weapon in the Naval Reserve.” No! Call me. I want to hear your voice. “
Twenge, 54, is a psychological and best -selling world, and it has appeared, in the past decade or so, as one of the voices of the world for the highest sounds in the world of research about what it deems clear and indisputable risks to smartphones and social media for children. She is practicing what she does at home.
Twenge said when she asked her to describe the approach of paternity and motherhood during an enlarged interview from her home in San Diego during the summer: “The presence of tangible rules reasonably is the way to go.” “When things are wrong, it is often because I love,” well, this only once. “Then it explodes in my face.”
The main between the TWENGE bases: There is no smartphone until you get your driver’s license. There are no social media until 16 years old.
TWEENGE (Twain-EGE) is not necessarily a familiar name like her collaborators, sometimes Jonathan Hydet, a social psychologist and author of “The Ceanuies Generation”, who spent 75 weeks hovering near the top list of the best seller in the New York Times. But it was among the few academics who warn loudly and continuously from teenagers and screens for a decade.
Its viral article 2017, Have smartphones destroyed a generation? – She warned of her book “Igen” – that children born after 1995, was the first generation to spend the full adolescence period with smartphones, suffering from higher rates of anxiety, depression and unity in part because they were spending a lot of time on the screens.
Although there is a new lawsuit at the present time-when adolescents spend an average of 4.8 hours on social media daily, and nearly three quarters say they used Chatbot Amnesty International for Correvance-TWECH has made the lightning penis in the world of research, where some academics are still skeptical of panic on smartphones.
“Jean began the conversation,” Heidt told me, adding that he and “Twin” were imprisoned in a battle with those who rejected for years. He said: “The world has woke up – or rather I must say that parents, teachers, coaches, psychologists and everyone who works with children” have woke up, after seeing “something is going well, and now They are taking action. ”
Parents face the impossible opposite winds
Twenge, a professor at San Diego State University, has spent most of her career in studying the differences between generations. It has not started to spend the past decade in a warning from smartphones. It was a natural bump to research, because it believes that technology-whether it was phones, air conditioning, or birth control-is what drives the differences between generations.
But while many of her research and writing were dependent on pictures and great ideas, her last book, “10 rules for raising children in the world of high technology”, are concrete as it comes, not only from TWEENGE research and the experience of paternity and personal motherhood, but for years of conversations and questions full of parents who were wearing everything: How can I get my child to call the phone?
She said it is a question that is born from the love of parents, but it is also despair. Because Twente believes that although general health warnings about social media and mental health of young people are increased, at the present time, the arduous task of maintaining the safety of children on the Internet is still directly on parents.
“Often it seems that the whole world is conspiring to keep our children associated with technology,” she writes in her new book. “This is because.”
In fact, while developmental psychologists Like Candice Odgers Ownership The case was taken very publicly With the idea that smartphones hurt the mental health of adolescents, a few experts deny how they formed an American childhood. On average, children get the first smartphone of eleven years of age, according to Twente data that cite her book, and uses approximately 40 percent of children between the ages of 10 and 12 years of social media. 2023 Pio Report I found that nearly half of the teenagers said they used the Internet “almost constantly”.
The ten TWENGE rules – which first include giving children a basic phone that allows them to communicate and text but limits applications, in fact using strong parents’ control elements – even clear. In part of it, this is because it is “very difficult to be surprising and correct,” Twenge told me. But this is also because despite the fears related to parenthood and the call for warnings on social media platforms, “Most families do not follow these rules,” she said. “this Why do I think they need. “
Twenge is realistic about the types of arguments that the bases can launch at home. She said that her three daughters had retreated against her and her 21 -year -old husband, sometimes somewhat difficult.
13-year-old has grabbed her phone in bed-broken the first base of TWEENGE. The 15 -year -old infiltrated her computer and settings on parental controls. Twenge said that her middle daughter took every opportunity to try to reach social media, and on Twenge “he prevented him at every point.” “I have no perfect children, I am not perfect,” she added. “I am the first to admit it.”
I have made concessions. Kate Discord used her laptop to chat with friends. Julia is Swift Total, so she reluctantly agreed to allow her to install her on her phone, although she has concerns about this.
However, Twenge believes that the risk of giving children a lot of access is very early than justifying any battles that erupt at home. It simply does not buy the argument that limiting the access of children to devices and social media will destroy their social lives.
“My children did not face any problem socially,” said Twenge. “In many studies, teenagers who do not use social media at all are the least likely depression.”
Mobility in non -negotiation
The rule that Twenge said is the “most important in the book”: there are no screens in the bedroom overnight. She said it is easier for parents to implement, even for those who have already given teenagers their smartphones and unrestricted access. (You can definitely reinstall the bottle, write Twenge.)
“The biggest connection to happiness, and the largest link to depression is sleep – always.” She added that teenagers are already struggling because of the school start times. “Phones and social media just take them to this terrible level.”
Perhaps the really only amazing rule in the new TWEENGE book is the guidance of giving teenagers their first smartphone until they obtain their driving license. This is significantly late in groups such as waiting until eight indicates. But children don’t really need a phone that supports the Internet at the beginning of high school, as it argues with Twenge, because they can get a “Dumbphone” (TWENGE term). So they can still contact friends, texts and listen to music. She is the elderly of that era, if they want to see their friends, they can do this Irl.
When Twenge began talking about screen time and social media, she was cautious about recommending specific age restrictions for parents – which remains many experts, regardless of her and Hydet – they hate doing it.
Research on smartphones, social media and teenage mental health tend to show associations, not the cause and a clear result, and studies have proposed many other factors, including economic insecurity and climate change, may contribute to the exacerbation of mental health worldwide. An article in the New York Times 2023: Everyone says social media is bad for young people. Proof that it is another thing.
But Twenge has lost patience with experts who repeat that every family and child is different, so there is no single answer that suits everyone about the amount of access that children should enjoy, or when they should get a phone.
She said, “With many other things in society, we choose and adhere to it,” she said. “We don’t say,” Oh, some 12 -year -old children are ready to lead, and some 20 -year -old children are not, so it is up to the individual or the matter is up to the father. “
Expectations: somewhat optimistic
Despite the spread of social media and the rise of artificial intelligence, Twenge said it is optimistic about some of the movement you feel in the conversation on these issues at the national level. She pointed to the success of Hida’s book as evidence that people are noticeable.
Twenge also referred to the energy of the two parties about the ban on phones from the bell to Bell in schools, and the recent Supreme Court’s decision that allows Texas to impose a law that requires age verification on pornographic sites. She indicated, once again, the fact that there are now more options for children’s basic phones, which are believed to be a change for real games.
“It may be tempting to surrender, but this is very important for us to give up,” said Twenge about the difficult sites that parents find themselves at the present time. “I believe in doing your power to fix a problem, even when the situation is frustrating, and even when you cannot completely solve it.”