TThe devastating attack on train passengers in Cambridgeshire last weekend was shocking. There has been talk of heroes who risked their lives to help others, and Those who hid To save their lives. If you’re like me, you’ll ask yourself: What if it were me? How can I deal? Who will I be when the worst happens?
Some of us imagine that we will come to the rescue, fighting off the attackers. Others, perhaps the more realistic among us, expect escape, extricating ourselves from the situation as quickly and efficiently as possible. Most of us would like to think that we will maintain our desire to run, and stick around long enough to provide assistance to those in need.
People tend to think of “fight or flight” as the body’s natural responses to danger. But the reality is much more complex. As humans, we are social beings, which means we also have a “caring and friendship” drive. You see it all the time in emergency situations. In fact, my background in police psychology has shown me that one of the biggest challenges in dealing with any disaster, whether it’s a plane crash, or a threat to a school, is dealing with all the people who will inevitably gather at the scene: people running toward danger. Not to confront them, but to reach out to their loved ones. When we are in a life-threatening situation, we have an instinctive desire to pull those we love closer to us. We also have an innate desire to protect those who have been hurt.
So, what turns someone into an assistant? The first thing to remember is that running away does not mean cowardice. If someone comes at you with a weapon, fear is logical, and flight is adaptive. Removing yourself from the situation is the rational thing to do. But once you do, you will be presented with new opportunities. You may not be the one who will attack the attacker, but I’m willing to bet that once you do what evolution has programmed you to do and remove yourself from danger, you will then turn to those affected, and offer them help. This is the reaction of inclination and friendship in action. Remember, few things create bonds as quickly or as strongly as danger. Once you have survived the immediate threat, the survival of those around you will likely become your top priority.
It also depends on who we see ourselves as. Do we imagine ourselves as heroes? It may seem silly, but what we imagine for ourselves can create a behavior blueprint, a mental model that provides us with a template for how to respond in a crisis. Charts are incredibly important in fast-moving situations. When our stress response is high, we lose the ability to think rationally. The part of the brain that controls rational thinking (the prefrontal cortex) receives less blood flow when we are in a highly stressful situation. So, instead, we rely on other parts of the brain (particularly the limbic system), which is responsible for things like instincts, emotions, muscle memory, and schemas. Having a pre-existing blueprint in place Includes our help It will go a long way toward creating this behavior.
It is also important whether we have experience in emergency situations before. In my experience, emergency services and military personnel often do Excellent in crisesBecause they have learned to suppress the immediate stress response, and calm themselves long enough to assess the situation and know what to do. But anyone who has learned how to manage their fear reaction can do well in a situation like this. The truth is that surviving past crises is a powerful learning for us. It tells us that we can experience terrible things, and we can survive.
Another factor is how closely a person is defined as someone who does good things. Some people spend a lot of time thinking about the value they add to the world. Other people don’t. If you do, you’re more likely to do it Want to help? Because that is simply who you are.
The truth is that disasters, for the most part, move quickly. The moments may seem like hours, but they will pass in the blink of an eye. And then you remain the survivor of the worst times. If that happens, it’s okay to not be okay. In the immediate aftermath of a life-threatening event, most of us will collapse. Even if it’s only for a short time. If, in the aftermath of trauma, you experience traumatic memories, difficulty sleeping, or feel tense, tearful or angry, know that this is the human response to stress doing what it does best. Your brain has been exposed to unexpected and terrible circumstances. She must now build a place to store these experiences – a new blueprint, where you are the survivor. That could be a Rugged operation.
But what we also know is that, for most people, these feelings will stabilize over time, as the initial stress response fades and this new piece of you is integrated into your understanding of who you are. Sometimes, if your stress response persists, some help may be needed to help you process your experiences. Remember, terrible moments strike each of us differently, and weave their way into our past experiences and current situations, creating a unique response for each person affected.
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Most importantly, permanent scarring is far from a given. People caught up in terrible events like the one in Cambridgeshire last weekend will probably never forget it. But they will adapt. Many people who lived through the worst times, who now have the identity of survivors, Experience report Feeling long-term post-traumatic growth. That doesn’t mean they don’t wish it hadn’t happened, or that they didn’t have to live through it. But because they lived it, the person they became was stronger than they were before.
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Emma Kavanagh is a psychologist who worked for many years in the police and army. Her books include: How to Be Broken and The Psychopath Effect, which will be published in 2026
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In the United Kingdom, a charity mind Available on 0300 123 3393. In the US, call or text Mental Health America On 988 or chat 988lifeline.org. In Australia, support is available at Beyond blue On the number 1300 22 4636, Lifeline On 13 11 14 and on Men’s line On 1300789978